I mean, look at that smile.
Less than 1,000 first-year students at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill are out-of-state students. Of the near 20,000 undergrads at UNC, 82% are from the state of North Carolina.
At orientation the summer before my freshman year, the orientation leaders recommended to “join one or two organizations or clubs maximum your freshman fall. Organizations and clubs will help you meet people.”
Cool. I thought. It seemed like good advice for a kid from New Jersey. I’ll try out for the club soccer team and hopefully that will be my organization.
The start of classes came around, I tried out for the team, and thankfully made the squad. The fall season was great, but busy: 3 practices and 1 weight room session per week, 3 overnight tournaments, 20+ games, and lots of travel.
For an out-of-state freshman beginning to tackle the beast that is college, joining a club with at least 10 hours of commitment per week meant there was limited time for me to fully embrace the social scene of a big state school. I returned home for winter break, unsure how I felt about the fall semester and the different groups of people I had met. Though, I always said I liked the guys on the soccer team.
Returning to Chapel Hill in the spring was definitely a little bit anxiety inducing, it still didn’t feel like home. In the first week back to school, a soccer teammate, who was also a freshman, texted me and told me to swing by his suite to come hang out.
That boy was Serhat Calikoglu, a Chapel Hill local. Serhat had friends from high school and knew plenty of other kids from North Carolina at UNC. No freshman at UNC went to my high school, and I didn’t really know any other first years from New Jersey.
He didn’t have to invite me over. He didn’t need to make more friends. He didn’t have to reach out whatsoever. He didn’t have to be kind.
In my years at Carolina, I lived with Serhat my sophomore year, and two of his freshman year suite-mates my junior year. Four years together on the club soccer team, he is one of my best friends. That team is not just a club, it's my guys, my homies, my slimes, my day 1's, my boys, my family. It has people like Serhat, who make Chapel Hill not just their home, but your home too.
It’s Friday, and I’m headed to Raleigh tonight to celebrate Serhat’s birthday. I’ll be sure to tell more soccer stories soon, but this one is for Serhat.
Join that club. Put yourself in places to meet new people. Reach out to those who might not have their family yet. And be kind, like Serhat.
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